I'm tired of hearing about innocent victims. It's fiction, If you live on this planet you're guilty, period, f*** you, next case, end of report. Your birth certificate is proof of guilt.

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

Let's not have a double standard. One standard will do just fine.

Flowers are one of the few things we buy, bring home, watch die, and we don't ask for our money back.

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election

Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.