Picture your grandmother in Hell, baking pies... without an oven.

I go to bed early; my favorite dream comes on at nine.

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.

Isn’t making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.

One thing leads to another? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.

So I live in Los Angeles, and it's kind of a goofy place. They have an airport named after John Wayne. That ought to explain it. It has a charming kind of superstitious innocence.