We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing

I don't think we really gave barbarism a fair try.

I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.

I never worry that all hell will break loose. My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.

Energy experts have announced the development of a new fuel made from human brain tissue. It's called assohol.

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.

If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain