I'd go on runs [on cocaine ], four and five days without sleep. Then I'd crash and sleep about 18 hours a day for seven to ten days. Then it would take a few more weeks to get over a vague sort of depression. Then I'd be off on another run.

The straightest line between a straight distance is two points.

Broadway isn't a very big career move. There's no money in it and it doesn't mean anything to your career. It's just a nice little jewel in the crown.

Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

I don't like the phrase shock value. Surprise is essential in comedy, and if people are shocked by what I consider merely surprising, then that's their shock. But there is no joke without surprise.

I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.

As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing.