I believe my first duty is to survive. And I'm not just talking about criminals coming into my home. I once seriously considered getting a gun to protect myself from the police. If I need a weapon to continue living, I'll get one. And I'll use it.
George CarlinOne time. In 1965. August, for about an hour, I was both fine AND dandy at the same time. But nobody asked me how I was.
George CarlinWhen someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
George CarlinThere is nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine ... been here 4 1/2 billion years. We've been here, what, a 100,000 years, maybe 200,000. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry a little over 200 years. 200 years versus 4 1/2 billion. And we have the conceit to think that somehow we're a threat? The planet isn't going away. We are.
George Carlin