If you can't say something nice about a person, go ahead

When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.

The Muslims observe their Sabbath on Friday, the Jews observe on Saturday, and the Christians on Sunday. By the time Monday rolls around God is completely f***in' worn out.

The enjoyment has been diminishing. Now, there's no question that it's sort of fun to get high.

The Human Species could have been great but instead we became satisfied with lights on our tennis shoes.

I like to write without being stoned. I like to have a hit or two and then go punch up the writing. I just see different things and hear different things. But it's nice to be working from the base that I wrote originally and then come to it with a little buzz. I can have a little wine from time to time. I have a hit from time to time, but those are the only things I do.

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?