I kind of like it when a lot of people die, and on the other hand I always wonder how many unused frequent-flier miles they had.

If someone loves you and they leave and don't come back, it was never meant to be. If someone loves you and they leave and come back, set them on fire.

How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn't a lot worth paying attention to.

Most people are not particularly good at anything.

Never underestimate the role pretension plays when it comes to creating euphemistic language.