To me, fast food is when a cheetah eats an antelope.

The next time a prostitute solicits your business, ask for the clergyman's rate.

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.

President George Bush declared a National Day of Prayer for Peace. This was after he had carefully arranged and started the war.

One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you're too tired.

Sex criminals. Completely incurable... I suppose you could outlaw religion and these sex crimes would disappear in a generation or two, but we don't have time for rational solutions.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?