Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
George CarlinWhen you quit school at an early age, I think you have a lifelong need to show the world - and maybe yourself - that you're really smart after all.
George CarlinOn Thanksgiving, you realize you're living in a modern world. Millions of turkeys baste themselves in millions of ovens that clean themselves.
George Carlin