I look at it this way... For centuries now, man has done everything he can to destroy, defile, and interfere with nature: clear-cutting forests, strip-mining mountains, poisoning the atmosphere, over-fishing the oceans, polluting the rivers and lakes, destroying wetlands and aquifers... so when nature strikes back, and smacks him on the head and kicks him in the nuts, I enjoy that. I have absolutely no sympathy for human beings whatsoever. None. And no matter what kind of problem humans are facing, whether it's natural or man-made, I always hope it gets worse.
George CarlinWhen you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn't a lot worth paying attention to.
George CarlinIn terms of coke, the only money I ever thought about was that dollar bill I had stuck up my nose.
George CarlinHave you noticed when you wear a hat for a long time it feels like it's not there anymore? And then when you take it off it feels like it's still there?
George Carlin