What year did Jesus think it was?

Whereas your blackness, ethnicity, homosexuality is something that might be genetic, I can't touch that, and I have no right.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.

Sometimes, after I'd gone at the coke like one of those snow plows moving up First Avenue, I'd think my heart was over on the dresser, pounding, and I was watching it. I asked some of the doctors who drifted through the intensive-care unit what kind of effect total cocaine abuse has on the heart and they said things like, "Well, there's not enough valid information...." That kind of answer.

By the next one [albom],Occupation: Foole, I was right back into the trip again. I'm more frantic, more breathless. You can hear how sick I am. If you want to see a cokehead, just look at the pictures on the Occupation: Foole album.

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.