I actually was a writer who had the ability to perform his own work as opposed to a comedian who wrote his own material. So that really made me happy and changed my whole perspective.

We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing

What do dogs do on their day off?; Can't lie around – that's their job!

The enjoyment has been diminishing. Now, there's no question that it's sort of fun to get high.

I don't have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights.

I think we’re part of a greater wisdom that we will ever understand; a higher order, call it what you want. Know what I call it? The Big Electron. It doesn’t punish, it doesn’t reward, it doesn’t judge at all. It just is.

War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.