I don't have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.

I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a joint or not, I'd smoke a joint to figure it out. And I stayed high all day long.

Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

If black boxes survive air crashes - why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

I use the [vulgar] words because apparently these words do not corrupt morally. I'm from the street in New York, hung around in a tough neighborhood. It was common to curse, you make your point. It's a very effective language. I try not to overdo it. It's never to shock. I know where it fits, it's never to shock. There's no shock value left in words.

Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes. When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!