Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.

I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.

There are only two types of motorists: the idiots who drive slower than me, and the lunatics who go faster.

The mayfly lives only one day. And sometimes it rains.

I grew up in New York wanting to be like those funny men in the movies and on the radio.

If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain

I look at it this way... For centuries now, man has done everything he can to destroy, defile, and interfere with nature: clear-cutting forests, strip-mining mountains, poisoning the atmosphere, over-fishing the oceans, polluting the rivers and lakes, destroying wetlands and aquifers... so when nature strikes back, and smacks him on the head and kicks him in the nuts, I enjoy that. I have absolutely no sympathy for human beings whatsoever. None. And no matter what kind of problem humans are facing, whether it's natural or man-made, I always hope it gets worse.