I recently bought a book of free verse. For twelve dollars.

I simply decided that dope wasn't worth the ritual.

Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.

Politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You don't.

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me.

Religion - religion, at best - at BEST - is like a lift in your shoe. If you need it for a while, and it makes you walk straight and feel better - fine. But you don't need it forever, or you can become permanently disabled. Religion is like a lift in the shoe, and I say just don't ask me to wear your shoes. And let's not go down and nail lifts onto the natives' feet.