I try not to see new comics - their acts or their films. Part of that is professional. I don't want to be influenced. But another part is fear and jealousy. I'm afraid to see how good they might be. I don't like that emotion, but it's part of me.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.

I always wanted and enjoyed sex, but I never put much importance on scoring or having an athletic sex life. I guess I define myself more by my career and my commitment to a relationship than by my ability to have a lot of chicks or achieve ten orgasms in an evening.

I don't understand the problem with paroling Charles Manson? I say set him free and let him get on with his work. I have a long list of celebrities I'd be glad to share with him.

I've just completed a five-year period that can perhaps best be called a breathing spell. A time of getting my health back and gathering my strength. That time also included incredible cocaine abuse, a heart attack and my wife's recovery from both alcoholism and cocaine abuse.