It is only the cynicism that is born of success that is penetrating and valid.

No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched.

The notion that as a man grows older his illusions leave him is not quite true. What is true is that his early illusions are supplanted by new, and to him, equally convincing illusions.

Criticism is the windows and chandeliers of art: it illuminates the enveloping darkness in which art might otherwise rest only vaguely discernible, and perhaps altogether unseen.

An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

The sweetest memory is that which involves something which one should not have done; the bitterest, that which involves something which one should not have done, and which one did not do.