I think we all feel the same things most of the time, we just don't know how to put it into words. When I'm on stage, I say it. The truth makes people laugh.

I can never do nothing in this house!

The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.'

Sarah Palin is Latina. Pay-leen. She has an infant and a grandkid the same age. Latina!

Making a movie about one group of people isolates the larger majority. That's what I require of the projects that I'm involved with. I would not ever make a movie strictly for Latinos.

No particular race is the enemy. Ignorance is the enemy.

Max: What's a period? George: It's a bullet we dodge, go get ready.