In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.

If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.

One thing I can take credit for, along with the rest of show business, is when the red ribbons were out, we cured AIDS. Any advancements that came towards fighting AIDS were not done by scientists or doctors - it was people with little ribbons on their lapels.

I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.

I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.

People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.

A landlord is showing a couple around an apartment. The husband looks up and says, 'Wait a minute. This apartment doesn't have a ceiling.' The landlord answers, 'That's OK. The people upstairs don't walk around that much.'