Cancer is probably the most unfunny thing in the world, but I'm a comedian, and even cancer couldn't stop me from seeing the humor in what I went through.

Comedy is very controlling - you are making people laugh.

Show business is like riding a bicycle - when you fall off, the best thing to do is get up, brush yourself off and get back on again.

... I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Suddenly I had to spend all my time getting well.

The goal is to live a full, productive life even with all that ambiguity. No matter what happens, whether the cancer never flares up again or whether you die, the important thing is that the days that you have had you will have lived.

... every time I got disappointed I'd remember the Roseannadanna philosophy that says that you shouldn't cry over split milk 'cause if you spill some milk and instead of cleaning it up you just walk over it and start crying, they're gonna put you on lithium.

You feel completely in control when you hear a wave of laughter coming back at you that you have caused.