Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with your heart.

There are only so many ways to get people to go see stand-up, that it really is about the product; it's not so much about the theme of the show.

People don't admire you for what you hate, they admire you for what you do about it, and your slacks.

Lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who's really into you.

A man would rather be trampled by elephants on fire than tell you he's just not that into you.

A friend of mine told a story about a date with a guy she was really excited about: He stood her up. He then called her, begging her forgiveness and giving some excuse. She told him to get lost, telling him that he only gets one shot with her, and he blew it.

He doesn't need to be reminded you're great.