Part of me also knows that this generation is the least racist and most pro-gay, so that's great. But they have a real lack of gravitas. And they have no taste in music. Vampire Weekend? Can we play some music, please? Can we rock out for a minute? Where's your Metallica?

He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out. Because if he likes you, trust me, he will ask you out.

It is in that moment, when you really lay down your cards and see the relationship for what it was, that you'll find the freedom to kick it in the ass and let it go.

I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.

People say get a job doing something you love. So far no one has offered to hire me to eat Whoppers with a switchblade.

I don't know" means "NO!" "I don't know" means "I'm too cowardly to tell you the truth because I can't deal with confrontation." "I don't know" means please do the dirty work for me because I don't want to hurt your feelings even more then I already have.

If you date, you will meet your share of weirdos and jerks. That is as sure as death and taxes.