Terrorism is obviously on everybody's mind. The other day my son says to me, 'Daddy, how come the bad men hate us?' How sad is that? I actually got tears in my eyes - because he's 18. What kind of a moron am I raising?

I think all gay guys should get married. I think they should have to get married. They should have to adopt kids because, actually, I'm getting tired of their happy-go-lucky lifestyle. I've had it with them being all happy and in shape. I could look good in denim short shorts and combat boots, too, if I had all day to do leg presses at the gym.

How many of you text message? It's a great way of not communicating.

You think they could stop putting these experts on the news with their doomsday scenarios of how the terrorists might attack us? Because you get the sense they're coming up with ideas that these people haven't thought of themselves.

Americans are not gonna conserve. We're not gonna shift to smaller cars. We can't - we have big, fat kids.

If being a gangster were a prerequisite to being a musician, there'd be a lot less cello music, for example.

It's hard to distinguish when I was actually struggling from when I only felt like I was struggling - which was pretty much always.