I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.

Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.

If you do not find me funny, that is your problem and I am not going away.

I like the night life, I like to boogy.

My feeling is, we ran from animals for three million years. It's our time now. If a cow could eat you, it would. And it wouldn't care how comfortable your truck ride over was, either.

I'm old and my knowledge is strictly horizontal.

People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.