Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.

You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!

I understand that smoking is vaguely inappropriate in certain situations. You know, like an orphanage, cancer ward, whatever.

I just feel like history is very much alive and important and I don't, you know, I can't worry about whether people get it or not, per se.

I have to hear this all the time in England: Well, all Americans are fat and stupid, mm-hm-hm-hm-hm. Really? Well, thanks for sending over the best and brightest to start the party. Maybe we can send a few freaky, Texas, militia, hate-group, gun-toting weirdoes back to your country.

White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.

I like the night life, I like to boogy.