I'm always looking for that place, you know, where there's no rednecks, that place where people get along, and I never find it. I went to Australia, right, and I thought Australia was gonna be a groovy, surfnoid, smoke-a-joint wombat, you know? 'G'day mate!' 'No worries!' And it's like Arkansas with a beach. It's a whole country with a 'No Fat Chicks' sticker on it.

I'm old and my knowledge is strictly horizontal.

Yo. I'm from Beverly Hills, and I be pimpin'.

President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.

Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.

You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.

People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.