We don't know anything about Scottish history. All we know is that an American guy painted his face blue and somehow they won.

People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.

I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.

Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.

Talking to the British about sex is like talking to Americans about reading. Nobody does it so why talk about it?

President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.

I would never advocate the use of dope because, you know, I'm not a professional athlete and I don't have access to the good stuff.