There is no freedom of speech if you're a conservative.
Some high society lady said is your horse outside? No ma'am, he's between my legs, but your too fat to ride.
We've got a Muslim for a president who hates cowboys, hates cowgirls, hates fishing, hates farming, loves gays and we hate him!
Have pity on a dinosaur.
Good friends, good whiskey, and good lovin', I want to thank you Lord.
I'd love to spit some Beechnut in that dude's eye and shoot him with my ole forty-five.