Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.

True Love can be no deeper than your capacity for friendship, no higher than your ideals, and no broader than the scope of your vision.

The feminine vanity-case is the graveyard of masculine illusions.

To a man, marriage means giving up four out of five of the chiffonier drawers; to a woman, giving up four out of five of her opinions.

True love isn't the kind that endures through long years of absence, but the kind that endures through long years of propinquity.

Marriage is the operation by which a woman's vanity and a man's egotism are extracted without an anaesthetic.

Alas, why will a man spend months trying to hand over his liberty to a woman--and the rest of his life trying to get it back again?