Matrimony is the price of love -- divorce, the rebate.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Soft, sweet things with a lot of fancy dressing - that's what a little boy loves to eat and a grown man prefers to marry.

Honeymoons are the beginning of wisdom--but the beginning of wisdom is the end of romance.

No man can understand why a woman shouldn't prefer a good reputation to a good time.

In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practice which is still continued.

There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to learn of the rest of them.