Eternity: The interval between the time when a woman discovers that a man is in love with her and the time when he finds it out himself and tells her about it.

A man always mistakes a woman's clinging devotion for weakness, until he discovers that it requires the strength of Samson, the patience of Job, and the finesse of Solomon to untwine it.

Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.

Ever since Eve started it all by offering Adam the apple, woman's punishment has been to supply a man with food then suffer the consequences when it disagrees with him.

It's easier to hide your light under a bushel than to keep your shady side dark.

When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.

A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor.