In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.

A bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever.

What a man calls his 'conscience' is merely the mental action that follows a sentimental reaction after too much wine or love.

Flattery is like wine, which exhilarates a man for a moment, but usually ends by going to his head and making him act foolishly.

At twenty, a man feels awfully aged and blasé; at thirty, almost senile; at forty, "not so old"; and at fifty, positively skittish.

Marriage is the operation by which a woman's vanity and a man's egotism are extracted without an anaesthetic.

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few steps ahead is the one that's mad.