In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few steps ahead is the one that's mad.

When a girl marries she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.

Estimated from a wife's experience, the average man spends fully one-quarter of his life in looking for his shoes.

A man can become so accustomed to the thought of his own faults that he will begin to cherish them as charming little 'personal characteristics.'

Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in the same way more than half of the time.

There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after breakfast.