A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.

Going through life without love is like going through a good dinner without an appetite -- everything seems so flat and tasteless.

A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.

When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.

Some men are born for matrimony, some achieve matrimony -- but most of them are merely poor dodgers.

Alas, why will a man spend months trying to hand over his liberty to a woman--and the rest of his life trying to get it back again?

Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in the same way more than half of the time.