Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.

Never worry for fear you have broken a man's heart; at the worst it is only sprained and a week's rest will put it in perfect working condition again.

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

What a man calls his 'conscience' is merely the mental action that follows a sentimental reaction after too much wine or love.

Every man wants a woman to appeal to his better side, his nobler instincts, and his higher nature - and another woman to help him forget them.

Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man.

There are more ways of killing a man's love than by strangling it to death, but that's the usual way.