There was a spell in the second half when I took my heart off my sleeve and put it in my mouth.

Paul Furlong is my vintage Rolls Royce and he cost me nothing. We polish him, look after him, and I have him fine tuned by my mechanics. We take good care of him because we have to drive him every day, not just save him for weddings.

If I fell into a barrel of boobs, I'd come out sucking my thumb

It's all very well having a great pianist playing but it's no good if you haven't got anyone to get the piano on the stage in the first place, otherwise the pianist would be standing there with no bloody piano to play.

My old trainer used to tell us not to blast, but to caress the ball whenever we took possession. If the ball were a woman... she would be spending all night with Berbatov.

I watched Arsenal in the Champions League the other week playing some of the best football I've ever seen and yet they couldn't have scored in a brothel with two grand in their pockets!

I've got four women in my house - my wife and my three daughters - and I tell you what, it's pretty scary. I keep my head down and if we're out shopping I try and look in a man's shop while they make their minds up.