As I understand it, sport is hard work for which you do not get paid.
Golf - a young man's vice and an old man's penance.
If I wanted to go crazy I would do it in Washington because it would not be noticed
A funeral eulogy is a belated plea for the defense delivered after the evidence is all in.
You had to hate the Colonel a whole lot to keep from loving him.
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.