A woman may have a witty tongue or a stinging pen but she will never laugh at her own individual shortcomings.

Golf - a young man's vice and an old man's penance.

I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.

If I wanted to go crazy I would do it in Washington because it would not be noticed

If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.

Middle age: when you begin to exchange your emotions for symptoms.

Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.