When I give concerts, the tickets sell for five dollars to one hundred dollars, but for my concerts the five-dollar seats are down in front... the further back you go, the more you have to pay. The hundred dollar seats are the last two rows, and those tickets go like hotcakes! In fact, if you pay two hundred dollars you don't have to come at all.
Jack BennyI don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.
Jack BennyNo matter how often I tell people I'm thirty-nine some of them refuse to believe I'm that old.
Jack BennyWhen you talk about the world's greatest entertainer you have to say Al Jolson because there was no one like him. Only Judy Garland and perhaps Frank Sinatra got anywhere near him!
Jack Benny