My comedy doesn't come from any calculations and studies.

I was so self -conscious, every time football players went into a huddle, I thought they were talking about me.

Hillary Clinton's life has been filled with corruption but nobody cares.

The main problem with the Democrats is their utter negativity. They're made up of schumucks and hypocrites. They also have higher levels of immorality.

Blacks can get into medical school with a lower grade ... If that's true, a Jew should be able to play basketball with a lower net.

Jews are living in the past and they can't get over it.

Prostitutes go to jail. Their customers go home and read the New York Times. In this country you're allowed to buy anything. If you need a shirt, you have a right to buy it. If you need sex, you don't. What's more important, sex or a shirt?