A Jew never laughs without looking at his wife for approval.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Older Jews think of Franklin Delano Roosevelt and see themselves as siding with the working class and the poor, so they continue to vote the way they do.

I have nothing but love in my heart and everything I say is just an instrument for laughs.

Only the Republican Party cares about the issues that concern me.

People make fools out of themselves in all sorts of ways. No particular qualifications or particular criteria are necessary.

The New York Times distorts and defrauds the news and then claims to be impartial. They never give an even-handed version of the news - that's the last thing they'd ever do.