I... wonder what it is in the New York air that enables me to sit up till all hours of the night in an atmosphere which in London would make a horse dizzy, but here merely clears the brain.

My mind is not a bed to be made and remade.

The English instinctively admire any man who has no talent and is modest about it.

I don't know very much but what I do know I know better than anybody, and I don't want to argue about it…My mind is not a bed to be made and re-made.

New Year's resolution: To refrain from saying witty, unkind things, unless they are really witty and irreparably damaging.

A professional is a man who can do his job when he doesn't feel like it. An amateur is a man who can't do his job when he does feel like it.

Don't pity me now, don't pity me never; I'm going to do nothing for ever and ever.