You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.
You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.
You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.
You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
You might be a redneck if your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events.