You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!

If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck

Ladies have come up with all these expressions to reassure men. "Oh, honey, it's not the size of the ship, it's the motion of the ocean." That may be true, but it takes a long time to get to England in a rowboat.

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.

You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.

You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.