You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.