You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.

You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.

You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

Any job that posts a price list for your body parts is a bad job.

You might be a redneck if you can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.