Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.

You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.

You might be a redneck if there are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.

We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.

I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.

You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

I think for one thing, kids are a lot smarter now then we ever were.