Everyone who reads me is someone I'd like to hang out with.

I'm not lazy. I'm simply judicious about excess movement.

You think you're so cool just because you can walk!

No matter how happy anyone is with their choices, I believe it's human nature to wonder about the path not taken.

Amen,' I exclaim, accidentally spitting out a Raisinet. I pick up the chocolate with a Kleenex and stuff it in my purse. Ten bucks says a month from now I'll have forgotten about it and will finally have said heart attack when I assume a rat shat in there.

Owning a dog is slightly less expensive than being addicted to crack.

Fortunately, all it takes for us to be of one mind is some buttercream frosting.