If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks.
Jeremy ClarksonIf we build three million new houses by 2020, where will we grow all the stuff needed to feed the people who live in them?
Jeremy ClarksonDoes anyone really imagine for a moment that my wife gives two stuffs about global warming? She certainly did not appear to be all that bothered on Thursday evening when, during the great carbon-saving switch-off, I ran round the house furiously turning on every light, hair dryer, dishwasher and toaster.
Jeremy Clarkson