Planet Earth thought it had £10. But it turns out we only had £2. Which means everyone must lose 80% of their wealth

Why is the forecast so bland? Why instead of 'stormy' don't they just say the sea's 'a frothing maelstrom of terror and hopelessness'?

I rang up Jay Kay, who's got one, and said: 'Can we borrow yours?' and he said, 'Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing.'

This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory.

I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

Asking the front wheels of a car to do their normal job of steering while handling more than 170 is like asking a man to wire a plug while juggling. Penguins. While making love. To a beautiful woman while on fire, on stage. In front of the Queen. It's all going to go wrong.

We all know that small cars are good for us. But so is cod liver oil. And jogging.