Marriage is like the witness protection programme: you get all new clothes, you live in the suburbs, and you're not allowed to see your friends anymore.
My daughter wanted a new pair of trainers. I told her You're eleven, make your own!
Most harm is done by people who are awake.
Capitalism is a great idea in theory, but in practice it just doesn't work.
Why don't people just accept that life is sad and cheer up? After all, it's not going to last for ever.
Northern Ireland is part of Ireland, not Britain, as can clearly be seen from aerial photographs.